What To Consider Before Getting Married Again
After a divorce, you may be ready to find “The One” again. However, walking down the aisle for a second time comes with many considerations. It’s not as easy this time around. You’re starting out with an ex-spouse, possibly children, financial issues, alimony, and child support. Your spouse-to-be may have the same issues. How will you cope with everything?
The truth is that many people don’t cope. They didn’t learn from the mistakes in their first marriage, so they keep repeating them. Don’t make the same mistakes in your next marriage. Here are some things to consider before you say “I do” again.
You’re the Common Denominator
If the same things that happened in your first marriage are happening in your second marriage, perhaps you’re to blame. You need to understand why your marriage failed and take responsibility for what happened in order to move on.
Kids Can Break a Relationship
Many people have kids to help a relationship, but that rarely happens. Kids are a lot of work, especially when there are children from both your and your new spouse’s previous marriage. There’s bound to be conflicts over kids. Not everyone will get along. They may hate you. They may miss their old life. Divorce is tough on kids and not all are ready to move on quickly. So be patient and compassionate, but don’t expect them to fall in love with you as quickly as your new partner did.
A Second Marriage is Like a Merger
Marriages are like businesses. In your first marriage, you’re starting from scratch, which is actually easier than a second marriage, which is like a merger. You’re combining assets, liabilities, children, rules, and more. You may be used to doing things your way, but your spouse and his or her children may object. Nobody will get their way most of the time. It can be a frustrating and challenging situation, which is why not everyone is cut out to get married a second time. Everyone has to give 100% all the time. If they don’t, then things will get rough and you may have to think about divorce #2.
There’s no hurry to get married again, so take your time. Get to really know your new partner and their family. You shouldn’t feel pressured to get married again quickly. Your relationships should be great whether or not you are married. Communicate. Talk about all the details. If there are problems now, get them resolved quickly—at least before you walk down the aisle. Getting married just makes issues worse.
Contact a Maryland Family Law Attorney Today
Getting married can sound exciting, but if this is your second or third time around, beware. Things are not as easy when you have the baggage of exes and children involved.
If your marriage does end in divorce, the Columbia divorce lawyers at The Law Offices of Todd K. Mohink, P.A. is here for you. We have resources to help you move on. Fill out the online form or call (410) 774-5987 to schedule a consultation. We have two offices to serve you.