Getting divorced is never easy, and this is especially true if you’re divorcing a narcissist. A narcissist is someone who has an inflated sense of self-importance. They have a huge ego, so to speak. They always have to be the center of attention and cannot handle criticism. Narcissism is more common in men, but women can have it as well.
While most divorces are settled outside of court—only 5% go to court—it can be hard to settle a divorce when you’re married to a narcissist. Narcissists are likely to end up in court because they are in it to win it. They are highly manipulative and will do whatever it takes to get their way. They will run up the bills and try to get you in court again and again. They’ll badmouth you and harm your reputation.
This can be frustrating to all involved. How can you keep your cool and get your divorce finalized as quickly as possible without wanting to strangle your ex? Here are some tips to keep in mind as you navigate through the divorce process.
You need to let your lawyer know about your ex’s behavior as soon as possible so they know what to expect. If your lawyer is uncomfortable and inexperienced with this type of behavior, it may be best to switch lawyers. You need someone who will be proactive and set boundaries. Otherwise, your ex will manipulate your lawyer as well.
Speaking of setting boundaries, this is something you will need to do early on. However, narcissists don’t respect other people’s boundaries, so setting them during a divorce can be challenging. But you need to let your ex know what kind of treatment you will and will not put up with. If you have children, establishing boundaries will also help set the tone of your post-divorce relationship.
While your ex is the one who needs the most psychological help, don’t neglect yourself. Dealing with a narcissist is no walk in the park. A good therapist can help you cope with divorcing a narcissist and can even help you keep your sanity.
With a narcissist, everything becomes a battle. However, if you put all your time and energy into every battle, you’ll end up exhausted. Think about the most important battle, such as those involving your children. Prepare to walk away from the fights that don’t matter. This will keep you focused and might even make your ex wonder what is wrong with you.
Narcissists have to win at all costs. They will also make themselves out to be the victim, so as you can imagine, divorcing a narcissist will not be easy.
You need someone on your side who can help you manage this type of person. Columbia divorce lawyer from The Law Offices of Todd K. Mohink, P.A. can help you through even the most difficult divorce cases. Schedule a consultation to get started. Call (410) 774-5987 or fill out the online form.
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