Recovering from a divorce can be a long process. This is especially true if the marriage lasted decades. It can be hard to move on and go from married life to a single person.
There is no set time as for how long one should grieve. Everyone moves at their own pace. Some people are ready to move on after just a few months, while others take years.
While there are various schools of thought as to how one should recover after divorce, there are, in general, several stages that a person will go through as they deal with the aftermath of a broken marriage. Here they are in more detail.
This is the phase where you try to reject the pain that comes with the divorce. You may feel numb as you try to adjust to the loss of your spouse through divorce. You are trying to absorb everything and you may even be in denial, especially if you did not initiate the divorce.
You will feel intense feelings during this stage. You are releasing the feelings you may have bottled up from the rejection stage and they can be uncomfortable. Be aware of triggers that make you feel extremely emotional. You can then find ways to deal with these triggers.
At this point, you may be trying to come up with scenarios to help alleviate the emotional pain. You may be trying to postpone your recovery through a temporary escape. You may even want to get back with your spouse. Do not try to go back and stay connected to the marriage. Move forward; otherwise, you’re just stalling the recovery process.
As you head into this phase, you start to feel reality creeping in. You cannot negotiate or go back now, so you have to dive forward. You become more aware of your feelings. You may feel sadness and regret and may want to isolate yourself. Instead, be sure to seek support from others. While it’s fine to spend some time alone to gather your thoughts and feelings, be sure to stay social and share your feelings with others. This will help you heal. Seek therapy if necessary. It will help you process your feelings as you recover and face the reality of your divorce.
This is the final stage of divorce recovery. Here, you learn to accept reality. You may still feel pain from the divorce, but you are moving forward and accepting your new life as a single person. You are looking at the future and are actually excited to create a new life on your own.
Everybody grieves and recovers from divorce in different ways and different timelines. As long as you are making progress and not focusing on the past, you’ll soon be able to rebuild your life.
The Columbia divorce lawyers at the Law Offices of Todd K. Mohink, P.A. can help you through the legal aspects of your divorce as well as the emotional aspects of post-divorce recovery. Learn more by filling out the online form or calling (410) 774-5987. We have two offices to serve you.
7310 Ritchie Highway, Suite 910
Glen Burnie, MD 21061
30 Corporate Center
10440 Little Patuxent Parkway,
Columbia, MD 21044