People who are fighting over the custody of children are plagued with stress, anguish, anxiety, and anger. There can be a great deal of resentment and hostility, and the desire to air dirty laundry can be unbearable. With all these emotions, it can be tough to take a deep breath and be mindful of the end goal. To help with your custody questions and more, contact an attorney. Here are just five simple things that you should absolutely avoid at all cost when going through a custody battle.
No doubt the fastest way to alienate your ex and make yourself look terrible in front of a judge is to run your proverbial mouth on the Internet. Many a men and women have found themselves trying to answer for stupid and thoughtless things they posted on social media. From pictures of themselves drinking with the new romantic fling to angry comments about the ex, there’s just nothing good that ever comes from social media. Even innocent posts can be taken out of context. Our advice: temporarily shut it all down, and live in the present. Enjoy the sunshine, take a walk, spend time with people who support you, and leave the Internet alone. You can always join up again later when life calms down.
Never, ever get into a physical or hostile confrontation with an ex. If you see that the situation is getting tense, walk away. Your children and your ability to have time with them is more important than anything you might gain in the moment. Many otherwise wonderful parents who love their children dearly have lost substantial parenting time (time you can never get back) simply because they allowed their anger to get the better of them. One little shove, slap, or other act of domestic assault can cost you more than you can possibly imagine. Just don’t do it.
If you are getting divorced, it means you’re still married. If you start “dating” (e.g. having sex with other people), then you are committing adultery, which is grounds for divorce in Maryland. Doing this may not have a huge effect on child custody, but it can definitely have a negative impact on your divorce. Plus, judges really dislike litigants who can’t be bothered to exercise a little discretion for the benefit of the kids.
If you are not married, there’s nothing that requires you to be celibate, but the law looks at the best interests of the child. If you want to show your devotion, it’s best to avoid those types of relationships and put your custody battle first. There will be time to start relationships later.
It ought to go without saying, but the court is going to be looking at what is in the “best interests of the child.” If you are habitually drunk or gambling compulsively, or addicted to drugs, you are going to be at a real disadvantage in arguing for why you should spend more time with your child. If you need help breaking the addiction, talk to an experienced lawyer about getting a referral for treatment. Show that you are 100 percent committed to bettering yourself and being the best parent you can be.
Lastly, courts actually look at whether either party is actively “alienating affection” of the child with the other parent. This is a fancy way of saying, you should never talk badly about your ex in front of the child. This is a huge no-no for the courts, and it shows that the more time you spend with the child, the more harm you’ll do.
The best way to ensure the outcome you want is to make parenting your number one priority. Hire an experienced attorney, ask for advice, and focus all your efforts on getting as much time as possible with your child. Time is precious, and you can never get it back. Call Todd K. Mohink, P.A. today in Maryland if you need help fighting for custody of your children.
7310 Ritchie Highway, Suite 910
Glen Burnie, MD 21061
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10440 Little Patuxent Parkway,
Columbia, MD 21044